The Wait.

During our past month and a half of waiting...and waiting...and not being able to get in touch with our licensing worker, I've had a wave of emotions flood me.

It's exciting when things are happening and keeping us busy, but when we have to wait...we have time to think, to doubt, to wonder, to pray...and wait.

Emotions. The biggest one I've been dealing with is...

I'm not sure what you would call it.

Doubt, or fatigue?

When we have our crazy days, when the kids are going nuclear, when middle sister is throwing one of her huge screaming fits, when I don't get enough sleep and end up yelling at the kids, when they are fighting, the days when all I want to do is send ALL my kids away and curl up in my bed and sleep and pretend my home is neat and tidy and that my to-do list is checked off....

That is when doubt creep ins. And/or fatigue.

"I'm too tired to have another kid in the house"

"middle sister is like 3 kids in one...maybe we have enough"

"oh, it would be so much easier to just not have to "deal" with this! To just continue doing what we are doing with our own kids & crazy lives....."

"Everyone does keep reminding me that we already have our hands full, maybe they are right."

But then I am reminded that of course it's not going to be easy.

Of course having 4 kids is going to be more tiring than three!

Of course raising a child who is not "yours" is going to be hard.

Of course we're going to have our hands full...

We already do, and it's great.

We've been praying diligently about this, and we can't ignore the need, or more importantly the call.

Even if at times we don't want to do it at all.

Doing God's work is not easy, he already warned us of that, but we are confident that with HIM, everything is going to work out just fine!

So....this leads me to say....

That after all these emotions, I was driving this morning and heard this song on the radio...and it spoke peace to me about what we are doing and why.

Then after a month and a half, we got a call from our worker! He is stopping by first thing Monday (if not sooner) and our inspections are in a week and a half!!

Perfect timing.

Always.

{scroll down & pause my music player}